Studio Stories and Legendary Selves

April 29th, 2010


Of the many thousands of experiences that we live,
we find language for only a portion of these……..

What happens to the rest….where do they live in our inner being?….where are they buried?….in our minds, our bodies, our spirits? Those unseen, unspoken experiences…how do they shape the form of our lives?

Casting the Spell Painting in Progress

Casting the Spell Painting in Progress

Our “mute” experiences exist somewhere in the essence of who we “be” in the world….sometimes causing dis-ease, imbalance and pain if they get “stuck” in our bodies. Sometimes inspiring actions that bring unwanted results.

Who I am is not what has happened to me although sometimes it feels that way…then how do I move from this place to being the conscious creator of my envisioned, enchanted life?

WITH A BIG PAINTBRUSH and a LARGE CANVAS…….

It all happens in the studio…releasing hurtful memories, transforming pain, dancing between the many facets of myself..

Creating art heals every particle of my being….I honor myself by painting.

( inspired by a book entitled “Night Train to Lisbon” by Pascal Mercier and the teachings of Shiloh Sophia McCloud)

A STUDIO STORY from my legendary self….dancing with paint…

Mutely my brush flies across the canvas, moving velvety rivers of paint like waves upon the sand….whoosh, whoosh…..

Sunlight drips through cragged, misshapen rocks of Prussian Blue, soft Titan Buff clouds swirling, edging close to corners of wispy pink haze touched with Quinacridone Magenta.

Dazzling Titanium White on a fan brush hovering overhead like a helicopter, dipping down and with a rapid stroke, feathers of light appear amidst dark swells of flesh.

Naples Yellow Hue on a small scrubber…flickering rapid movements, rhythmic brushing, glistening on emerging crescent moon….

Payne’s Gray for mystery and silken shadows…large scrubber…ooooh la la… colors of feelings coating the bristles of my brush. Memories floating down onto canvas like soft whispers that will drift across the hiding places in my soul.

Enchantment surrounds me, gauzy and ethereal like a wispy veil trailing down my body…enveloped by a glorious bliss

My palette tilts, drifting, blending, merging…giving birth anew to shades and tones….fresh little children of parent colors…motion shifts the feeling.

Quinacridone Burnt Orange, Naples Yellow Hue, touch of White Titanium, Titan Buff….moon glow upon the clouds…rivulets of wonder, becoming, becoming………now the Golden Chariot awaits the arrival of my Legendary Lady….who is she….what is her name?

In my studio I find a place to give space to all my emotions…..I am experiencing the liberation of an image of my self as limited and only able to respond in one way or another. The blurring of the boundaries of flesh and soul, of the physical and spiritual realms, happens upon my paint palette. The integration of the many facets of my mute experiences take place upon the canvas, in the telling of a story through layers and layers of colors, paints, bead, bone and shell. This is where an ordinary person such as myself tumbles into the extraordinary, re-inventing my life and discovering a new way of being in the world. The alchemy of art takes place as I express the essence of who I am…….

This is what I know about my legendary self

That there are many names I carry……. for the richness of my being is infinite…..

That they live inside me in a place called “The Inner Paradise Lounge”

That the Inner Paradise Lounge has tons of space and a room for each part of my Legendary Self….decorated to reflect her dreams and visions of the “perfect” environment

That if I give them plenty of space to express their many facets they naturally harmonize and balance one another out

That they allow me to SIMULTANEOUSLY experience seemingly opposite emotions…..

At the same time I can be greedy………and generous

Bodacious, bold…and…sweet and feminine

Flirtatious……and…………shy

Terrified……and…………..exhilarated

Demanding……and………reasonable

Tough………and…………..soft, yielding

Joyful……and……………..melancholy

Outrageous…and……….quietly present

That in the Lounge, I can…….offer roses to the moon

Ride a Golden Chariot across the sky

Toss my fears to the starry night

Paint my dreams and bead my bliss

Let me introduce you to some of my legendary selves, Past, Present and Future…………..

The Bejewelled Baroness- elegant, beautiful, full of grace, presence and dazzling light

Glitter Wasp- sparkling, brilliant light of midday sun, can be bitchy, definitely with an edge, no patience for “old boy’s club” mentality, champion of women artists, bold and feisty….partial to sequins and glitter….

Art Angel- compassionate, philanthropic, mentor to young women, feels the suffering of the world in her bones and is sometimes brought to her knees by it, infinitely generous, abundant

Sapphire Dawn- , mysterious, sultry lady of the break of day…full of promise, hope, embracing the unknown adventure before her with a deep blue essence

Velvet River- nighttime self…. Plunging down to the depths of my soul she brings up buried treasure, sensual and dark, crystals hiding in the shadows…

Carmella Rompompompleone-my punk rocker 20 year old self….outrageously rampageous world traveler, zebra striped eyebrow, design shaved in the side of my head with rhinestones glued in, total rebel, fun- loving furor

Sea Star Mermaid- loves the water, spends her life at the beach, immersed in the healing waters of the ocean, goes with the flow…loves the sun and anything tropical…

Esmerelda- my emerald lady….coming soon

Eva of the Evening Light….lady of dusk, my favorite time of day, sun dips into the ocean, savoring the mellow golden light cast by the sun sparkling on my goblet of wine

Gypsy Rose the Dreamer sweet bohemian rhapsody. Flowing chiffon scarves, wrists wrapped in bangles, passionate lady, phoenix rising

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